So that was Christmas
Wow, I'm wore out! The kids got far too many gifts, we were all drug around to places we didn't expect, and I ended up making a few (thousand) dozen cookies to pass out to all the last minute gift getters. What I thought would be a dull year turned into a circus! The highlight was the Ex deciding last minute he wanted to take the boys to see his grandmother who has early stages of Alzheimer's, but saying he couldn't handle them on his own. So I ended up coming along. As if spending time with my ex wasn't enough, I had to do it with his family and his grandmother who asked me every 5 minutes who I was and why I was there. The boys got the biggest loudest toys they could imagine from their father. Part of me thinks h did it on purpose and I'm almost tempted to let him have them for a few days and take the toys with them. Bear got a giant robotic dinosaur that growls and walks with this stomping sound echoing. And Bull got toy vacuum with bells inside of it that jiggle loudly as he pushes it all over the house. I can feel the migraine coming on. And just to make things better I woke up this morning with a stuffy nose and a sore throat. Hopefully 2008 will be better. |
Christmas Eve's Eve
 I can't believe tomorrow is Christmas Eve. It feels as if this entire year has just flew past me and left me foggy about the details. I know I was there, but it happened so quickly I'm not sure what all happened. Tomorrow morning we'll have breakfast then the boys get to open 1 gift each. They are old enough to figure out to go for the big boxes so I'm changing things up a bit this year. I'll choose three smaller gifts each and let them pick from those which to open. It will still have the excitement but I won't be worrying that they are opening the big gifts. Then tomorrow evening their father is coming to take them to his house for dinner. It is nice that they will get to celebrate that with him. I'll be home alone for the evening. Loverman is visiting his parents and sister and won't be back until after the first. He did surprise me with a small gift card to the movie rental place. I thought we had talked about it and were not getting each other gifts, so the card really surprised me. Now I'm trying to think of something small yet sweet to get him when he comes back. However with him out of town and the kids gone for most of the evening, and possibly the night as they were begging to sleep over at thir father's house, I'm a bit lost of what to do. I need a hobby. |
Monday Monday
 Yawn. It's a slow day at the office. OK, so I don't work in an office. But it's still a slow day. Usually Mondays are full of clients needing something, but today I can't even find a new job to take. Please, please don't slow down right before Christmas! Please! We're already looking at a tiny Christmas this year, I don't want to make it worse. I've actually gotten most of the gifts taken care of already. I just need to get my mom something and I'm done. Hopefully the kids won't be disappointed that e won't be overflowing with stuff. I know that Bear has been begging for one of the train sets on a table and an astronaut helmet for kids. Neither are anywhere near my price range. The only helmets I could find in his size are $50. Sorry kid, that's grocery money you're messing with. Bull wants a couple new balls to kick around. Since most of his were taken by neighborhood boys, blown away, or got smashed. And don't forget the poor football that met it's end with a lawnmower. It wasn't pretty. Loverman and I aren't exchanging gifts. I'm too broke and he doesn't celebrate anyway. This time of year I call him The Grinch. He doesn't want a tree or any decorations, hates holiday music, and never buys gifts. He assures me that his own family hasn't gotten gifts from him in nearly 10 years. I wouldn't know what to get him anyway. A new necktie? Labels: family, holiday fun |
Lunch
 Loverman has meetings all afternoon, but he was able to stop by for an early lunch date. Nothing fancy, just noodles from a box and sauce from a jar. I wish I could cook some fancy, homemade dish but that's not about to happen. At least not until the kids are old enough to give me space and quiet so I can think. When they start screaming and whining and asking for 50 million little things my brain just freezes up. That's usually when we have PB&J for lunch and call it good.I'm envious of the moms who seem to have it together. My two are enough to make my skin crawl at times. Not that I don't love them, I do. But I grew up as an only child, I'm used to quiet and calm and time to think. But these two are nonstop screaming, running, jumping, talking, moving machines. The only peace and quiet I get is after they're in bed for the night, and then I'm trying to clean up the mess they created all day. Down the road a few houses is a mom that just blows my mind. She's home all day with 7 kids, homeschools them all, and is the picture of peace and tranquility. She's so soft spoken, relaxed, and sane. She's always well dressed, even wears make up! The woman even has a garden and makes almost everything she cooks from scratch! How the hell does she do that? I can't even turn on the oven without stopping 5 times to break these two up or get them off the furniture. So I made spaghetti today. Loverman brought the boys poptarts, which did not help the situation at all, while I tried to cook the food. Even before he got there the boys were climbing onto the table and jumping off. 30 times I told them to stop and 30 times they climbed back up as soon as I was in the kitchen. But now they had pure sugar in their systems, so as I tried to not burn the meat they ran around in circles in the middle of the dining room screaming at the top of their lungs. Loverman hid in the bathroom. We did have a nice lunch with limited fighting. Then he was off with a quick kiss, back to the land of grown ups and mettings and conferences. And I'm here, pretending to be working. Oh God, I hear someone screaming "mama!". That's my cue to go. |
The gentle sound of kids killing each other
| *sigh* I need a double shot of brandy in my coffee tonight. My sons went to their father's house today. His sister was over and brought her son and daughters which are roughly the same age as mine. She also brought double fudge brownies. Now the boys are wired on chocolate and too much excitement. They are running laps through the house, slamming into each other and taking toys from one another. The last 10 minutes have been non-stop screaming/crying/shouting from the both of them. I've given up trying to stop it and have taken to hiding in the bathroom with my laptop until it is either over so they are worn down enough to go on to bed. This is the part of single parenting I hate. I love being able to make the decisions without needing anyone else's input, at least most of the time. But moments like this I need back up, some one who can step in and help me wrangle them. They wouldn't dare act this way when their father is around, or even when Loverman is here. They know that both of them mean business. Mom is a big old sucker though. I just cannot handle the noise and the constant action, it becomes stimulation overload for me. I'll do anything to just have a moment of peace and quiet. Labels: Bear, Bull, family, me me me, single parenting |
Countdown to turkey
| Tomorrow is Thanksgiving, my first with my sons alone. Last year I let their father take them so they could see his family but this year they are all mine. I'm a little nervous. We don't have any real plans. None of my family lives around here and we've got no where to go. I bought a small turkey, some stuffing mix, veggies, and an apple pie. Loveman is away on business until Sunday, so he won't be around. I hate that he has to work over Thanksgiving. But that's his choice. He came by last night to see me since he had to leave early this morning. I was hoping for a little romance, instead we watched a movie and ate ice cream. OK, kind of romantic. It was a romance, sort of. But once the movie was over he went home, even with me throwing myself at him. Sigh. Labels: family, holiday fun, me me me |
A run down of us
| I thought I should write down who every one is so that anyone who stumbles on this won't be confused. Hopefully no one I know in real life will stumble on this little blog, but just in case I'm using fake names. Well, except for my own. But Dawn is a fairly common name, so I'm not too worried there. First my kids: The men in my life: X-Factor: This would be my ex, and the father of my sons. He's a good guy and a good father. He works far too much, but he tries to see the boys when he can. He doesn't often "get it", but I'm beginning to think no man does. That's it for now. I'll come back and add more later. Labels: family |